Episode 23 - Henry Morgan's Cousin
In the harbour, the crews aboard the docked Sisterhood ships had awoken and were now milling around on deck. One after another, the vessels hoisted their sails aloft and raised anchor.
But from the dockside, the first shots rang-out as the pirate musketeers started picking off the startled Sisterhood sailors.
Moose looked on with glee. "We've caught dem wenches wit thar panties down! Haaarrr, give 'em 'ell, lads! SPIT!" he called.
More and more pirates opened up with pistol shot and muskets as the last of the cannons arrived.
"Fire at will!" ordered Moose, as the cannons swung into position and began pounding the hapless ships from the dockside.
Meanwhile, Davey Jones' troop had reached the far side of the Governors mansion, and the pirates were quietly making their way over the picket fences surrounding the estate.
The Cutthroats crossed a small field containing two-dozen tamed boars and the men were in two minds whether to continue towards the nearby building, or gleefully chase the boars around the field in the hope of catching an early lunch.
"Leave 'em be yew pox-ridden curds!" barked Davey as he tried to instill a little more discipline into his merry band. But a group of the Cutthroats had already begun to slaughter the hapless swines, and gleefully hoarded their carcasses into a pile - ready to transport them back to the ships when the battle was over.
NavyRum looked on with amusement at the pirates' antics, before ordering them to get back to the task at hand. "Haaar, we won't be eatin' ships bread 'n biscuits all they way ta Puerto Bello now, lads! Nottin' but ham 'n bacon from now on!" he laughed, as the blood-splattered men finished making short work of the last poor pig before turning their attention back towards the mansion.
Towards the south, Henry Morgan and the rest of the prisoners were being unceremoniously marched through the main gates that led into the courtyard, in the center of which stood a large bronze statue of a wild boar.
A group of gentry guards and local militia, recently disturbed by the commotion in town, were hurriedly kiting up with swords and pistols as a couple of man-servants brought their horses around from the stables.
"M'Lord, we have visitors!" announced a puzzled grounds-man to the headman as the bedraggled looking prisoners and the Armistad's crew ambled their way towards them.
The first mate of Annabelle's ship came to the front of the group and approached the gentry folks. "Sir, I'm Lieutenant Trisha of the Armistad," explained the woman, "We were taken by surprise whilst careening our ship. These pirates have held us against our will and stolen our Brig." she added.
The gentry folks listened intently as the woman continued recounting the last few hours' events, "On the far side of this island, at Smugglers Cove, there are two Pirate ships, one a Sloop, the other a Brig. The crews of these two ships have disembarked and are preparing to attack the town as we speak." she explained.
"Sounds like they've already started!" said one of the gentry folk, as the skirmish at the docks intensified.
The governors head-man stepped forth, "My dear, I'm afraid there's little we can do. We'll just have to pray that the good Captains CupperBut and Kat will be our saviors. Luckily for us, they're due to return to port tomorrow afternoon" he explained.
Another man came forward and inquired, "Who are these… sorry looking souls?" as he motioned towards Morgan and his mates.
"They're Cutthroats, Sir. Luckily we were able to out-wit our captors back at the Cove, and in our good fortune, were able to capture this band of vermin before they could reach the town." explained Trisha, before adding, "The tall one on the right is of the officer ranks. He's called Henry Morgan"
"Morgan, you say? I've heard of him!" proclaimed the headman, "If he's still sailing with those notorious blaggards, Captain Cognito and Maniac Moose, I fear for our town. They're murderous criminals and we should find a safe haven to hide!" he added, as he nervously looked down the cobbled road that led into town. "It won't belong before a hoard of their psychotic pirates come marching up the road! - I better go warn the Governor!" he said, as he quickly made his way into the mansion.
"Is there someplace we can secure the prisoners?" asked Trisha to the remaining gentry folks, "My crew and I want to make haste back into town and help defend it against the invaders" she added, anxiously.
But it was too late! A heavily armed group of Cutthroats, led by Davey Jones, appeared from behind the right side of the building, whilst simultaneously, from the left, an equal number of pirates appeared - led by Lieutenant NavyRum!
Morgan and the prisoners smiled as the astonished onlookers retreated back towards the mansion doorway.
"Arrr, time ta talk terms, me thinks!" announced Morgan, with a hearty laugh.
Meanwhile, back at the docks...
The cannons had been constantly blasting the helpless ships, many of which were ablaze. Dozens of rowboats containing the remaining Sisterhood crew's were hurriedly making their way across the bay and onto a long pebbled beech to the south of the town.
Moose's musketeers wasted no time in running along the dock towards several warehouses overlooking the beach.
"Keep 'em pinned down fer as long as yew can, lads" ordered the Captain, as he headed across to where six tired looking Cutthroats were stood. "Arrr, COGGY!" shouted Moose, on seeing his mate.
"Ahoy Moose!" replied Cog as he sat upon a dockside barrel and took a well-earned rest.
The two Captains sat and watched as the cannons finished off pounding the last of the undamaged ships.
"Tis a grand job ye done 'ere mate!" laughed Cog as he surveyed the smoldering Sisterhood ships, "Annabelle's tub is residing in the locker too - right at the harbours entrance - so even if these blimmy whores git one 'o two ships sea-worthy again, they won't go far!"
Moose nodded in agreement and offered his mate a bottle of grog, "'Ere ye go, Cogs, have ye a sip 'o dis. I fear we won't have time ta sample the local brews!" he said, before adding, "Tha locals 'r all hiding in thar purdy lil' houses, but we'd better not stay here fer too long."
Coggy took a swig of the rum before adding, "I see no reason ta hang around in dis cesspit anyhow. We's done enough damage fer one day."
At the governor's mansion, the Cutthroats had quickly disarmed the Armistad's crew and added the gentry folk and house-servants to their new band of prisoners.
After greeting Jones and NavyRum, Henry Morgan grabbed a cutlass and made his way over to the Armistad's officer, "I've been waiting ta do this ta yew since that lil' trick ye pulled back in the jungle" he laughed, as he grabbed Trisha by the throat!
Trisha glanced at the sword as the sunlight hit the blade - fear etched into her face.
Morgan slowly lifted the sword above his head as the pirates and their prisoners looked on in silence.
As quick as a flash, Morgan pulled her towards him and gave her a long-lingering kiss! And instantly put his sword away, "Haaarrr Haaarrr Haaaaaaaarrrrr!" laughed the pirate, as he shoved the shocked and blushing woman back into the gathering and gave her a wink.
The rest of the Cutthroats all burst into hearty laughter - leaving Trisha to spit in disgust and wipe her lips.
Just then, the headman stepped out of the building and immediately flung his arms into the air, "Oh dear!" he said, as he witnessed the rowdy bunch of pirates turn his way.
The laugher died down a little as the Governor of Santa Catalina emerged from the doorway behind the headman. He was a tall, bearded man, dressed in a grey tunic and leggings, with pigskin boots and a blue tricone hat atop his head with a single feather in it.
Morgan soon stopped laughing, as did Davey Jones. The two startled pirates slowly pushed their way through the crowd and looked on in amazement as they finally recognized the man.
"I don't friggin' believe me eyes!" announced the stunned Davey Jones.
"Nay mate, me neither!" added Morgan as he rushed up the steps towards the Governor and paused briefly right in front of the smiling man - before embracing him in a bear-hug!
NavyRum stood next to Davey Jones, and asked, "So, who it be?"
Jones smiled, "Mate… that thar fella be none other than 'Enrys long-lost cousin… Sir Loin 'o Beef!"
Morgan and the Governor continued to embrace for a moment, before finally shaking hands. Both men were grinning broadly.
"Beefy! I thought ye wus marooned! How'd ye end up 'ere? and a Gov'nor ta boot?" asked the overwhelmed Morgan.
"Arrr, 'Enry lad, tis a long story, but I'll tell ya this," replied Beef as he tipped his hat on recognizing Davey Jones, before turning back to Morgan and explaining, "Mate, I got ta thinking, I did, just after yer brief visit to me lil' island. I thinks to meself; 'Beefy yee've been marooned fer long enough and tis time ya returned ta civilization!'" explained the wily old sea dog.
"But how'd ye get off yer island?" asked Morgan again.
"Well, as good fortune would have it, less dan six months after yer visit, a Schooner comes along 'n decides ta careen thar fer a lil' while" replied Beefy, before adding, "As it 'appens, the good Cap'n 'o that thar ship be a blimmy woman no less! Aye a woman says I!" he said, with a grin.
By now Davey Jones and NavyRum had been drawn to the two cousins' conversation and were stood on the steps with the two men. They listened to Sir Loin 'o Beef's tale intently.
"Anyhow," continued Beef, "she offers me safe passage to a port 'o call and allowed me ta bring a few 'o me mates along too"
NavyRum interrupted, "Mates? What mates? I thought ye was marooned on yer own" he asked, with puzzlement.
Morgan answered for his cousin, "By his mates, he means tha wild boars dat lived thar with him! In his time thar, 'e tamed tha buggers 'n dey kept him company… Arrr tis a terrible ting ta suffer is a marooning - no one talk to, or nuffin"
It was clear to the pirates that Sir Loin was still a little insane from his many years of loneliness on the island.
Beefy echoed what his cousin had just said, "Aye, me precious pigs… they're good mates, they is. I got me 'em a lil' field out da back 'o the mansion 'ere. They goes where I go, they does."
Davey Jones and NavyRum looked at each other with a touch of concern, before realizing, with great embarrassment that the boars Beefy was talking about had been mercilessly hacked to pieces several minutes earlier!
The two men simultaneously turned around to face the sheepish pirates as they milled around the courtyard, some whistling, some trying to avoid eye-contact with the two officers… all were quickly wiping the pig-blood off their soiled clothes.
Beefy continued, "As fer me becoming Gov'nor, well mate, fortune smiled upon me again, it did. Fer tha Schooner saved me from me island solitude 'n whisked me away ta this very place. An' shiver me timbers! - this place be without a gov'nor 'n all… last one gone, 'e did, back ta Blighty he went!"
NavyRum grew more and more interested and again interrupted, "Back to Blighty ye say? That was my father. He was the Governor here once"
Again Beefy continued, "Anyhow, since tha place be devoid 'o men-folk… all ran out 'o town by the Sisterhood, ye see - I takes up residence 'an gives me mates the run 'o da joint. Got me a sculptor, I did, made many a statue 'o me beasts, did he. Paintings too! Grand paintings 'n pictures 'n tha like… of all me boars… me mates" he mumbled.
Now it was Morgan's turn to interrupt his cousins ramblings, "Ye say the men-folk were ran out 'o town?"
"Aye, all gone they 'as. Cept'n the non-seafaring types - like these gentry ponces 'n the like," explained Beef, as he motioned to the manservant's. "I pays 'em well, so I can call 'em what I like" he added.
Morgan laughed and gave his mate a hefty pat on the back, "Haaaarrrr, Beefy. Tis grand ta see fortune smile upon thee fer once. A Governor, a friggin' governor no less! Haaarrrr!"